For Becky and the Circle of Hurt

My beloved friend, who stole my heart in the college dorms and has blessed me for two decades with her friendship, told me last night that she and her community are hurting in the wake of two suicides in the local high school.  Bright, well-liked, active boys now gone.  I wonder at the inner turmoil that can lead to such finality.  I have seen dark places, but the door was always cracked and a sliver of light was always shining through. 

What to say?  My heart aches for those who do not know the value of their soul; that they are created, purposed, beloved, empowered, redeemed.  When Evil tells them they are failures, worthless, hopeless, and powerless, I want to shout, "NO!  Don't listen to the lies!" 

It's too late.  Now there is just aftermath.  But in the aftermath, there is that sliver of light. 

I thought I would share the lyrics to a new song I am working on.  It's a song for the aftermath.  I wish I could sing the plaintive melody for you, but for now, just the words...

More of God Now

It's the hard thanks you give in the dark
Sifting through the ashes for the beauty
Finding the tiny, little spark
And you know, you know more of God now

It's seeing how a loss can be a gain
How to travel light and hold loosely to things
Reaching up and out of pain
And you know, you know more of God now
Deeper, wider thoughts now

It's when you have no words to say
you're hoping someone says them for you
Until your timid prayers turn brave
You know, you know more of God now
Deeper, wider thoughts now
The weight of the cross now

It's when you're emptied out and bleeding
and, suddenly, you're overwhelmed by grace
That bit of hope is what you're needing
And you know, you know more of God now
Deeper, wider, broader, higher thoughts now
The weight of the cross now
More of God now